Sacrifice is Going On Tonight

Iron Maiden (UK)

The Number of the Beast

March 22, 1982

Everyone that listens to metal loves Iron Maiden unconditionally. I personally think they're a wee bit overrated, but the first three albums at least had some reputable significance. I'm not going to write much about this one. It's a classic, that's a fact. It's influence is inarguable. I prefer the more raw and aggressive style of metal, early Priest, Angel Witch, Motörhead, Diamond Head, Venom, etc. But because of bands like Iron Maiden, I can publicly flaunt my love of grimness without the one-way ticket to shrink town. And I do have a soft spot for genuine heavy metal, and 35 years ago The Number of the Beast was a legitimate threat. To someone out there, anyways. Oh well, today I'm spinning it again and not thinking twice. Bottoms up.

Tyrant, Every Man Shall Fall

Judas Priest (UK)

Sad Wings of Destiny

March 23, 1976

In my opinion, by far the most important and most influential Judas Priest album, and a monumental impression on the growth of heavy metal as a whole. Epic opener "Victim of Changes" sets the bar for badass attitude, feral fretboard mutilation and unheard of vocal acrobatics, and continues to be the best song they bust out live to this day. "The Ripper" prowls with midnight menace before "Dreamer Deceiver" slowly rises out of the psychedelic shadows that nightmares are made of into a spine chilling crescendo, charging right into the balls-out heaviest song on the album, "Deceiver". Side 2 opens with the musky and gothic "Prelude" before kicking into my absolute favourite Judas Priest song of all time, "Tyrant". This is classic heavy fucking metal, immaculately composed, hummable solos, anthemic chorus, chugging rhythms, and bloodlust ripping through the seams. "Genocide" is a bluesy bar rockin' number and "Epitaph" is the obligatory piano-driven cheese ballad. "Island of Domination" finishes things off with a confident upbeat stomp that even wades sadistically through some proto doom riffs that Black Sabbath wished had written. 36 years later, this is mandatory.

Ascend, Oh Beast of Fire

Portrait (Sweden)

Crimen Laesae Majestatis Divinae

May 9, 2011

Here's how to keep the spirit of true satanic heavy metal burning strong in a world plagued with enslavement, plight and false light. Throw that raggedy leather jacket back on, and don your occult paraphernalia for this one, because hellfire this magnificent is a luxury best served fatally skull thrashed in all manner of blackened damnation. Right out of the gates, "Beast of Fire" rips to shreds anyone within burning distance, setting aflame Mercyful Fate's midnight storytelling with the corrosive venom of Satan's hounds. "Infinite Descension" is the most like King Diamond's material, torn from the flesh of the 80's with murderous intentions. Darkness reigns over these sounds, the blues have been effectively annihilated as acoustic flares stand out in "The Wilderness Beyond" and "Darkness Forever". Landscapes of sorrow and shores of hopelessness are the eternal horizons showcased on the epic prophetic Dissection-channeling finale, "Der Todesking". Fucking tasty. Hail Satan and all that other cool shit. Read more to listen...

Destroy Their Modern Metal and Bang Your Fucking Head

Darkthrone (Norway)

Circle the Wagons

March 8, 2010

Darkthrone, of course, need no introduction. In fact, Darkthrone don't even need to be talked about, they're a mainstay. Circle the Wagons came out a couple years ago, and seems to justify how sirs Nocturno Culto and Fenriz have only been getting better and better. This is working class black 'n roll, a full moon escape into the woods after another bullshit week goes by where hedonism reigns supreme, and whiskey flows freely through the streams. The more they wear their crusty Motörhead by way of Manilla Road influences on their beer soaked sleeves, the more of their true sound is defined. Well, its off to work I go, take a listen below...

These Go to Eleven

Spinal Tap (UK)

This is Spinal Tap

March 2, 1984

On this day 28 years ago Spinal Tap came out. I have compiled a large selection of most of the funny/memorable moments from the film. If you have not seen this, here's the cheat sheet to get through your homework. This is absolutely mandatory. Check out this little teaser here, then roll up a fatty and read more for the rest.

But in That Fatal Portrait, My Spirit Came to Life Again

King Diamond (Denmark)

Fatal Portrait

February 17, 1986

It's time to send your mind on a trip into the land of dreams and mist. Before there was Ghost, before there was Emperor, and even before there was Bathory, there was a small satanic cult called Mercyful Fate. The leader of this nefarious band was the banshee ghost pitched King Diamond. In 1986, the King, having split from the others, released his first solo collection of odes to all things evil, dark and occult. The works of this infamous ringleader during the mid-80's from both bands are probably my favorites of the classic heavy metal style in general. The degree to which everything is so over-the-top and yet so iconic is surely commendable. By the first sounding of the 'ooohhhhs' in The Candle, like a choir of hallowed hellcrows, you will either love it or hate it. Proto black metal witch shrieks surface in The Jonah while the bombastic 80's is made manifest in the catchy melodies of Dressed in White and the anthemic Halloween. Read more and listen to this classic.

What's This, That Stands Before Me?

Black Sabbath (UK)

Black Sabbath

February 13, 1970

Happy birthday, heavy metal. 42 years young and counting. I don't need to say anything, as its all been said before, and will be retold until the end of time. All you need to hear are the 3 very first ominous notes to come out of the speakers and fate is sealed. This was the crossroads where the blues and rock and roll had aborted its unwanted dreary monstrosity of a fetus, left it alone in the darkness of midnight to fend for itself and adapt to the left hand path's malnourishment of nonconformity and fuzzed out 'Fuck You' attitude. You can argue that other more obscure bands paved the way for metal earlier than Sabbath (Coven, Black Widow, Lucifer's Friend, etc.), though none had the far-reaching influence, and exceptionally palatable darker occult themes that have become a mainstay in extreme forms of music. Take any metal band today and you can trace each and every riff back to Black Sabbath in some way. But what are you reading this for, you already know that. Take a listen down memory lane: